No One Told Us

The gf and I tried to go down town last night, to pick up some things at the mall.

But no one told us the city of Philadelphia closes at frickin' 7pm on a Saturday!!

My god, everything was closed!! We were in shock.

What the hell?? This is a major metropolitan city, not some backwoods little town. Granted, I realize that one should not traipse around certain parts of the city after 7pm. But this was all sorts of ridiculous.

While Riding the Subway

Electronic Voice: Doors are closing.
Me (in exact same voice): Move your ass.

I'm such a good friend.

S: I need a baseball bat and an alibi.
Me: You're in luck, I happen to have both for you.

Ladies, Please

I love 'Deal or No Deal.'

Especially for those two little words Howie says at the beginning of every show.

In the words of Bender from Futurama:

THE USPS CAN BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS!!!!

They lost my brother's birthday present, birthday card and anniversary card.

I am so mad right now I cannot form coherent thoughts.

And Counting

Happy Birthday to the older younger brother [screw you,'elder.' I'll say whatever I damn please]. Now I am really feeling old.

On the down side though, the stupid Post Office failed to deliver his gift in time. Which irks me, as I found a wonderful gift [Copies of Elseworlds comics that he had when we were younger, but got destroyed. Don't worry, he doesn't visit here, so I didn't ruin the surprise]

Be careful, PO, I am seriously beginning to loathe you. Which probably stems from the fact of my own recent package troubles with them as well as being treated as a post office myself once upon a time.

Hehehe

From here.

Two women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are comparing stories on how they died.

1st woman: I froze to death.

2nd woman: How horrible!

1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: so what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer; we'd both still be alive.

TV Shows

My taste in television shows is many and varied. Over the years I have seen a handful of episodes that are my absolute favorites. If you are a fan of any of these series, make sure you watch those particular eps.


Angel: Billy, You're Welcome

BtVS: Dopplegangland

X-Files: The Field Where I Died, How The Ghosts Stole Christmas, Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose, Paper Hearts

CSI: Pilot, Alter Boys, Jackpot, Play With Fire, Butterflied, Unusual Suspects,

Medium: practically any episode, but especially 'The Reckoning'

I hate Money

Simply because I do not have nearly enough of it.

I need, in no particular order:

a bike
a 30GB iPod
a new computer (as the other one has offically bit the dust)

And, it appears I won't be getting any tax refund. Instead, I get to pay. Woo-frickin-hoo.

Daylight Savings is the Real April Fool's Joke

My gf scared the hell out of me this morning when she woke me up to ask [beg] that I drive her to the symposium she was attending. All because it was an hour later than we thought it was.

I usually remember daylight savings, but it totally slipped my mind this time around.

Play The Fool

Especially today.

It's April Fool's Day. Yesterday was gorgeous and was enjoyed by all.

But I digress.

We've all been made a fool of in life. In jest or in cruelty. In the spirit of PostSecret, feel free to tell us how.